The Positive Side of Mind Control

The Girl in the Red Shirt

By: Susan Deborah Schiller

Life Story Writing Tip: Some of our stories are game changers. There are moments of our lives when suddenly it clicks and the trajectory of our life takes on a new direction. Usually it's the quiet moments, the ordinary days, when God speaks and we have an opportunity to change our course. When we don't listen, we get the not-so-quiet opportunities. We live the adventure of Grace, either way. Maybe this little story will help you to recall a time in your life when you suddenly "clicked" and began to walk in a different way…

Dressing for bed one night, I pulled on a red shirt, when out of the blue I heard a quiet voice in my heart say, "Take note and remember what you're wearing tonight." Since 1999 I've been learning to take moments of silence, to pause and listen to my heart. I've learned this is how our Heavenly Papa loves to chat with us. So I went to bed a bit puzzled but eager to learn what my Father was up to!

Then I fell asleep and dreamed:

What a noisy and fun playground! I was playing a high action game with a group of children. Hard to believe, but we were all taking turns shooting a high-powered rifle. There was much laughter and a sense of innocence. No one expected anything harmful to happen.

We were just playing, right?

It was my turn to shoot the gun and as my finger pulled the trigger a girl dressed in a red shirt fell to the ground. Total shock! None of us expected anything bad to happen. In fact, no one at all blamed me. It could have happened to any one of us. We each had been taking turns doing the very same thing.

The horror I felt was terrifying! It was so real, so deep and painful that I woke up, as if from a nightmare. But it wasn't a nightmare… it was a dream message.

As it often is in dreams, I was both characters: the girl in the red shirt who fell down dead and the girl who innocently fired the weapon while playing. My own belief system – all the "you're ugly, you'll never be good enough, no one will ever marry you" words, like verbal bullets, were killing the real me, in my conscious life. I was stuck in a performance mentality where I never measured up.

Not only did I have critical thoughts of myself, but I also had been entertaining critical thoughts about other people. Statistics show that the majority of humans think negative thoughts about about themselves and others 80% of the time! And we are our own worst enemies, the harshest critics, and the worst self-haters of all time. It's the environment we live in, even in most churches.

Words are like bullets, aimed to bring life or death, either to protect or to kill. Our lives are voice-controlled and whatever we speak is what we get.

Our tongues release words that are generated from our hearts, our belief system. Words release power – to change, to heal, to hurt, to bring life.

What if we were to discover that the circumstances in our lives right now are a direct result of our beliefs which lead to thoughts which lead to words which lead to actions which lead to results… whether for good or for evil.

In the book of Genesis we find that God spoke the world into existence, and when it came time to bring life to the first man, Adam, God breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, downloading His very own image – His DNA – into Adam. Adam woke up and began talking… he used his words to name all the animals and he learned how to manage the world around him through language.

God and Adam managed the world through voice control, and we do, too!

He had an idea, a thought, and suddenly or progressively the thought manifested into his reality! In the cool of the evenings, Adam and God walked and talked. Adam was never left alone to figure things out by himself, that is, until he and Eve blew it with the snake. They were evicted from the Garden of Eden, that place of walking and talking intimately with God.

Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.(Prov. 18:21 ESV)

I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, (Matt 12:36 ESV)

Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body. (Prov. 16:24 ESV)

For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.” (Matt 12:37 ESV)

A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit. (Prov 15:4 ESV)

We need to hear loving words from our Father. It changes how we see both God, ourselves, and others. It changes how we speak, and what we speak is what we get. What we think is who we are. I try to surround myself with people who are moving in this direction, and Graham Cooke is one of them.

Graham Cooke is paving the way in helping us to have brilliant thoughts! Have a listen for yourself… and imagine what the world would be like if we all began to consciously use voice-control, both inwardly and outwardly!

Part 1

Part 2

These are wonderful words to reframe our past, to sow into our future, and to chart a path to a better world. World change begins one person, one home, and one community at a time! We can all be world changers 🙂

Writing Prompt: Think of an intersection in your life's journey where you had to turn around, back track, and take a new path. What did you discover and how did it come about?

My Full Story     What I Believe    Contact Me

With all my love,


Susan Schiller knows how it feels to lose everything: marriage and family, church and reputation, finances and businesses, and more. Susan's upcoming, interactive memoir, "On the Way Home," tells the story of how she came to be known as "the most abused woman" her counselors had yet met and how she learned to navigate to freedom and fullness.  
Today Susan helps people write their life stories, unearthing the treasures of their past and sowing them into their future, creating new family legacies.

Copyright © 2010 to 2015 Team Family Online, All rights reserved.   For reprint permission or for any private or commercial use, in any form of media, please contact Susan Schiller

{ 20 comments… read them below or add one }

Ron July 19, 2012 at 10:17 pm

Such a great post Susan. Words are so powerful. Thanks for sharing this.


Jessica Stone July 19, 2012 at 8:25 pm

I love it when God shows me more of Him through His still, small voice.  He plants songs in my spirit in the mornings that set the tone for my day.  I LOVE it when He does that.  Some of my favorites have been "Oh Happy Day" which means my day will be joyful ~ "How He Loves" is a day for soaking in Him, in who He is ~ and "God's Not Dead" means we are going to war that day together!!  And those are just a few examples.  It means so much when He shows that He's there and He cares!  Just this week, while talking to my mom, He told her "grab a tissue" just seconds before I started to cry.  He's just showing me He loves me!!


Susan McKenzie July 20, 2012 at 7:29 am

Oh Jessica, what a BEAUTIFUL story! I hope you have written this one down for your children and grandchildren!!! Thanks so much for sharing it here 🙂


Claudia Looi July 19, 2012 at 7:13 pm

For years, I spoke negatively over my life and family. God in His Love and Mercy shows up with His Words of Life. When He Truth collides with Lies— thank God Truth reigns. Great post Susan. You are the Father's precious and beautiful child!


Susan McKenzie July 20, 2012 at 7:30 am

Wow, Claudia… you just fulfilled this post’s mission by speaking such a powerful word of life over me! I’m going to soak that is in – THANKS!


Matthew Reed July 19, 2012 at 10:44 am

My favorite part of this powerful post is when you say that often you need to make sure that you are focusing on 'God-talk' instead of 'self-talk'. 
What I think about me is nearly as important and certainly isn't as accurate as what God thinks about me. He thinks I'm awesome. 
Also, the section on the power of words always hits home to me. I have a remarkable ability for sarcasm, sadly. Too often it leaves a great deal of damage in my wake. I am reminded now to pray for God to control my tongue (inner voice and outer voice) since I cannot!


Mary Marriner July 19, 2012 at 9:24 am

Susan…I love what you write…It always ministers to me right where I need it.  I catch myself being overcome by situations and speaking out of frustration, rather than speaking out of God's heart.  The Word is so clear on this…but we are so dependent on God to be obedient.  Thank God for His mercy and grace!  Where would we be without it?


Susan McKenzie July 19, 2012 at 9:27 am

Mercy and grace… what BEAUTIFUL words! I agree with you, Mary… we can do nothing apart from Him. Thanks for reading and sharing 🙂


Olga Hermans July 19, 2012 at 8:52 am

I truly beleive that we are the prophet of our own lives; what we speak will come to pass. I am so thankfull that our God is a merciful God and that He is always there to remind us of what we are speaking. Our words can destroy good things in our life and they can build things up in our life. Thanks Susan for reminding us with so much quality content.


Susan McKenzie July 19, 2012 at 9:28 am

Coming from you, Olga, your words of encouragement go far… and I thank you for sharing!


Penny July 19, 2012 at 6:46 am

Hi Susan…great word, timely word, the confessions of our words are my passion, I spent many years of my life speaking death into my situations. God has taught me so much about what we speak, how speak and it bringing life or death. Thank you for sharing, you are such a talented writer, I really enjoy your blogs!


Susan McKenzie July 19, 2012 at 7:19 am

You’re very kind, Penny! Thanks so much for taking time to share <3


Sabjb January 6, 2011 at 10:14 pm

Dear Susan,
We did read and found your article to be very well written you obviously have a generous gift from God there. I have made no comment I think you have addressed the subject very well. Keep moving forward in your journey with the Father of Lights. He is the lover of your soul and will prosper you as your soul prospers. He has made all this possible thru His great sacrifice. Behold all things have been made new. When the atom was split over Hiroshima and Nagasaki it was power the world had never seen before. A greater power was released when the two Adam’s clashed at Calvary. We have become one New Man both male and female. Journey on my dear sister and discover who you have become in him. Please give Randy our love and blessings and both your prayers for our physical healing is welcomed. May our Lord baptize you both in His Holy Fire in this great year of 2011. He is worthy of our utmost for His Finished Work in us.

Love you, Stephen & Julie Bundra


Susan McKenzie January 7, 2011 at 10:51 pm

Thank you for reading and commenting, Stephen & Julie – blessings!


Lily January 1, 2011 at 1:58 pm

Susan, what a moving story! What a terrible shame that (your?) father made such a decision about you. I also experienced a similar but perhaps not so extreme experience myself, because I was the girl in a traditonal mediterranean-style family. Even though I was deeply loved and supported in many ways, I was also given less freedom, had fewer and lower expectations put on me compared to my brother, etc. Guess the result! You’re absolutely right about the internal negative thought patterns this sort of thing creates in us. But I’ve become aware of it all and am working hard on changing them over the last few years. Consider that we live in a country where women have far greater freedom and opportunity than many others around the world, and so many of us here are struggling with these issues. You’re a trailblazer!

Many thanks,


Susan McKenzie January 7, 2011 at 10:50 pm

It’s amazing how sharing our stories causes us to find ways to bond…. we find ourselves on similar paths! What a remarkable woman you are, Lily, directly combating the number one obstacle to success – fear. It’s an honor to know you!


Anonymous December 31, 2010 at 9:47 pm

You demonstrate with every article that life is not to be viewed through a narrow lens of guilt, regret or shame but from a place of love and gratitude for the lessons we have had the opportunity to learn…and by your example, then share. You are an amazing person, a brilliantly talented writer and I am grateful to have connected with you and your husband. You have taught me so much. Thank you. Love and Light always~denny


Susan McKenzie December 31, 2010 at 11:14 pm

You are very kind, Denny…. your words go far to bring encouragement and inspiration to me and many others – thank you for taking the time to read and comment – you are greatly appreciated! Sending love and light to you for a Happy New Year!


Carla December 31, 2010 at 12:57 am


Your story is so near my own that I had to read parts of it twice. It nearly took me to my knees when you exposed your father’s intent to help your brother and sisters. You see my dad did the same thing only not in such a loving way. I was a freshman in high school when he dropped his bomb. It stuck with me my whole life and it wasn’t until about 5 years ago that I discovered how it had affected my sisters, too.

I had wondered if I would reveal this part of my story when I get to it in my book. Now…I know I will because we never know who it might help. Thanks for being so transparent and sharing the real story with all of us.



Susan McKenzie December 31, 2010 at 3:19 am

We’ve been walking a very similar journey, it sounds, Carla – I really look forward to hearing your story! You’re so right about not hesitating to share, because so many are suffering in silence… smiles on their faces but inwardly troubled by long-past mistakes.

It seems this very scenario is much more common than anyone realizes… and what I’ve been hearing, from so many women, is the troubling aspect of a father loving his daughter very much… and then she matures into a young woman complete with all the features that draw a man’s attention… and what I’ve been hearing from these women is that their father’s – by rejecting them – were actually trying to protect them from desires being awakened in their own male bodies. It’s very sad…. but on the other side is the father who violates the daughter…. so both responses are negatives to the daughter, but who would want to choose one or the other?

So these women – now in their 40’s, 50’s, and 60’s – are still suffering from that rejection… because it changed their whole life, as it did mine. I’ve also listened to many, many stories of fathers on the other extreme, violating their daughters, and honestly, I don’t know which is harder on the daughter… the one extreme or the other.

I don’t know if that’s what your father went through or not… but in sharing our stories it opens up dialogue… it gives these women ‘permission’ or an open door to talk.

I envision many young women reading these stories and having a safe place to talk… then they don’t have to carry the heavy baggage the older women have carried. Sometimes understanding an issue takes the pain away, and realizing that it’s common – and we’re not tarnished – can really help. Secrets and darkness bring pain. Light and truth bring healing.

This is one way to create a “new family legacy” … and hopefully if any men are reading this, perhaps they can provide a picture from the other point of view.

Thanks so much for sharing, Carla – your story is going to make a huge difference!


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