The Greatest Gifts of God are Yours
And that includes a home, a job, and "daily bread"
By: Susan Deborah Schiller
Together, we're pushing through something hugely dark – and it's moving. We're pushing it out of our own hearts and homes, first. Dear heart, your faith, hope, and love are piercingly beautiful! Your fierce love is shining; it's piercing the darkness. Never give up!
You tried to end your life, but God saved you. I know it's beyond your ability to bear. There is nothing worse than living among evil people who are disguised as religious leaders.
The phrase that God only gives us what we can bear is not accurate, in my opinion. The enemy comes to steal our souls, by murdering our dreams and devouring our identity. And that is what the enemy has done to you through both the evil people and the foolish people who aid and abet the evil ones.
I understand not being able to work and support yourself. It's like you're already dead inside, and the physical act of suicide is only making evident the inner state of your being.
No one around you cares to see what has really happened to you! They think it's merely a "low self-esteem" issue instead of calling it what it really is – an intentional diabolical strategy to devalue you in every way possible, to murder your spirit and steal your soul.
I'm glad you are reaching out for help. I'm glad you have a therapist and you call the help line when it gets bad. It will be worth it one day, to keep going, I promise. It's usually darkest just before the dawn.
I still get dark days – but I've seen the pattern. Usually 1-3 days after the a very bad day there will be a significant breakthrough. It makes me rejoice, even, for the bad days!
Dear heart, I don't understand all of what is happening to us, but I do know that somehow we are pushing through – collectively – and breaking the power of this evil. You may feel small and powerless, but you're more powerful than you realize. Look at all you've endured and yet YOU STILL LOVE GOD AND YOURSELF AND YOUR FAMILY! You even love your enemy!
I can feel the beauty in your soul. I can feel the treasure and the enormous value of your life. You are a GREAT ONE, indeed! You have more missions that God himself will empower you to accomplish.
It seems dark right now but remember it's always darkest just before something good happens. At least that is what I'm discovering as I watch these patterns play out in my own life.
When a really dark day comes along and despair is knocking at my door, I tell myself to remember – and to expect to the Goodness of God to shine through. And He's never once failed me!
It will be this way for you, too. Your beauty has grown so immensely, even though you feel exhausted, broken, and ready to exit this life stage. With all my heart I hope you will keep asking for help, stay with your therapist, and keep calling the hotline whenever you need to.
There are many of us right now who don't know how this is all going to play out. We have God. We have peace. But the whole world seems to be shaking around us. And all we can do is face Him, looking into His eyes, and raise our hands to Heaven and say, "Lord come!" And He does come. He plunges into the heart of the maelstrom of abuse. He shows up in the heart of the plague of unlove. This is our God!
I don't blame those who have exited by their own hands, but I mourn for their loss. They are the sensitive ones, the ones who love the Light – and we need each other, every single one. The world is not worthy of such ones.
I don't blame you for trying to leave, dear heart. But I encourage you to stay. I sense the beauty of your soul. Fyodor Doestoyevsky once said that beauty will save the world.
Maybe that is why the Bride of Christ is being refined and purified, every spot, stain, and wrinkle removed. As in Psalm 45 she is being clothed in a bridal garment fit for a heavenly queen. The King is ravished by her beauty, and together they are going to set things right in this world. I believe this with all my heart.
And so I pray…
I ask God, the comforter, to come and infuse you with Divine Consolation. I command the enemy in control of all forces of darkness in your life to be still and to be silent. Let this captive go! And Holy Spirit, please come and gently sustain and nurture this child. Give her the gifts of Hope, Faith, and Love. Let her know she is cherished and has never been unloved a single day in her life.
Oh Father of heavenly lights in whom there is no shifting shadows or changing, your heart is so delighted for this daughter – I just feel your intense pleasure over her. And I ask you to lift her up high above the demonic hoard. Give her wings as an eagle. Release her from the grasp of her enemies. I sense you are already going before her and clearing the way. Thank you, Abba… thank you.
Father, I ask you for Divine resources to be placed in her hands. Give her the keys to the Kingdom and show her how to procure the resources she needs apart from worldly ways. You are not a hard task master, but instead you have come to take her heavy load and to team up with her, lending her your strength and courage.
Dear heart, in my spirit I am shouting from a mountain top that you are FREE! You are FREE indeed because the Truth has set you free. THe truth is that you are LOVED. The Truth is that you have every resource you need to complete your life's mission on earth. The Truth is you are NOT ALONE and you are not abandoned. The Truth is that you are a very special woman indeed.
I speak to your spirit to rise up. I speak to your body to be cleansed and healed. Cleansed of all the toxic garbage poured into you by the Father of lies through a distorted religious lens. I speak to your soul to be at rest.
I see all your shackles falling off as you rediscover who you are, who you belong to, and who owns you – Christ Jesus, our Messiah. Evil has no power – it's been disarmed. Your chains are breaking. All of heaven is moving on your behalf.
This I see and declare of you, until it manifests in the natural realm. You wanted to die to see your spirit rise up and be free. But I believe God wants you to know that your spirit can rise up and be free, even while in this earth body. He wants to dine with you in the presence of your enemies. (Psalm 23) He wants you to experience ruling in the midst of your enemies, even grinning in the face of disaster…. because that is what our God does.
This is who He is – he is the Kindest person you'll ever know… and He's so confident in His ability to confound your enemies and bless you right in front of them!
Dear heart, please discard any words here that don't resonate with you. My words are nothing compared to His Words over you. I hope you will take His Words and speak them out loud. And be open to both natural and supernatural provision.
It's not easy, but it's worth it. Never give up. The greatest gifts are yours – faith, hope, and love – take as much as you need!
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
I share this letter today in the hope that you will send love to this woman, pray for her, and know that we are all connected. We are all together in this resistance. We are resisting evil every time we choose love. And evil is moving. This resistance is hard – it's not easy. But we are piercing the darkness every time one of us has the courage to share her story, to listen to someone else' story, and to pray. You are stronger than you think! Never give up!
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With all my love,
Sue
Susan Schiller knows how it feels to lose everything: marriage and family, church and reputation, finances and businesses, and more. Susan's upcoming, interactive memoir, "On the Way Home," tells the story of how she came to be known as "the most abused woman" her counselors had yet met and how she learned to navigate to freedom and fullness.
Today Susan helps people write their life stories, unearthing the treasures of their past and sowing them into their future, creating new family legacies.
Copyright © 2010 to 2015 Team Family Online, All rights reserved. For reprint permission or for any private or commercial use, in any form of media, please contact Susan Schiller.
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
Dear Susan, this is the telegram version of my two previous attempts, two hours of writing, vanishes every time I try to write you.
Moved my 30 yr sociapath son and his innocent unaware girlfriend in with us.
Is. 62 is my chapter fot trusting God for his restoral. Has shown sociapath behavior at a young age, but only have I realized that now. I am a rescuer. Praying God change me, internet info
says he cannot change. No capacity to love, empathize, only to manipulate. He is a grounded eagle with the potential to mortally wound emotionally mentally anyone including himself in his path. Gifted, strong, but the part of the brain that makes an eagle an eagle is dead!
I gave created a hell in my home by rescuing again and not trusting God. What to do now? Pray, repent rest, repeat.
Any wisdom or prayers from you, coveted. You are one of a very few who understand this battleground.
Thank you dear heart, love Sparrow
I have thought of you often, Sparrow, and event now my heart melts as I feel your mother’s heart. The heart of God is to rescue, isn’t it… and also to let go, and the wisdom and discernment to know which and when.
I’ve made many more mistakes that most people, Sparrow. Their brains operate differently than normal brains. You can’t rationalize with them, but like you, I know the heart of God is to redeem ALL of us, even them.
If your son truly is sociopathic, or living in unrepentant sin that brings harm to everyone around, then you know how it feels to have evil so nearby. Evil affects each one of us deeply. The effects appear to be longlasting, unless Jesus sovereignly cleanses us. We need each other desperately, because, as you say, hardly anyone understands the agony of living with a sociopath.
The pain of isolation is trauma upon trauma.
Dear Sparrow, I so wish I could offer you good news! I wish I could tell you what will work for your son. THere are things I’d like to say but it’s not my place. We each have our own link to Father who has a unique path for each one.
I have found, though, that rescuing can backfire, in the case of a pathological family member. It’s so easy for them to push our buttons, to take advantage of our mercy, and neverending forgiveness. Please guard your heart, Sparrow – you have such a huge reservoir of empathy and compassion!
You may wish to see the help of a counselor in dealing with your adult son. There may be some practical tips they can provide that will help!
Please let me know how it goes, because I’m praying that you find the release you need…. to let your son go, if need be… because the arms of God are not too short to bring redemption in unexpected ways. I so much hate evil more and more every day, Sparrow. In this world we don’t always see the victory in our own generation. But we will see it with our own eyes, and we’ll look back on these days and see through His perspective.
I wish you love, love, and more love, Sparrow – love for yourself, that you would feel the Love of God comforting you right now, lifting all oppression, and giving you the desire of your heart.
xxxoooxxx