Light House in the Storm

Light House in the Storm

By: Susan Deborah Schiller

An entry from an online diary – interactive with other abuse survivors – part of my mini-memoir-in-progress…

July 13, 2011

Last evening I had dinner with a friend, and she invited me to rent her house from her, as she is leaving to work out East…. it would be affordable… 3 bedrooms, even…. a place for my children to come 'home' to.

I've been living in a small camper in a lovely place along the river on the property of an elderly woman… but there is no running water, bath, kitchen or toilet… so winter could be a tough season. It's a big jump, though, financially. Asking God to lead me on this one…

Note from the future, I talk to the former woman I used to be: Affordable housing for a woman who down-graded her education to accommodate her husband's needs and requests, whose husband took two free and clear cars from her, plus her inheritance … and then helped him start his own insurance business while homeschooling their three children… who was persecuted, even to the point of threatening to end her life, when she began earning too much money working part-time… who remained in that subservient position, with her church's pat on the back, for 20 years…

Affordable housing for a woman who gave her all for her family and now has nothing to her name… that is the desire of her heart, to have a home – an oasis of love – for her children and grandchildren to enjoy with her.

All you ever wanted was to be a wife and mom, to love and be loved, and to have a home to fulfill your mission in life.

Family is the backbone of society. The center of all healing, education, spirituality, economics, government, security – everything – needs to be home-based. God's Word speaks of a tribal system that is based on family and leaders of families. Everything godly is tied to HOME. A mother is the heart of the home.

Affordable housing… is one thing the majority of overcomers of sociopathic abuse do not have. We are like war veterans who land back home, some of us with PTSD, others with severed limbs, and all of us with major neurological damage.

We are mothers and grandmothers, daughters and nieces and aunts and sisters. Some of us have houses but many of us do not. I know what it is like to have a large house, a small house, and a tiny camper. I know what it is like to be homeless, living in a hayfield, or in a hotel.

I dare to believe in God's redemptive plan to restore DOUBLE for what has been lost!

This is the property I heard God tell me, "Your investment will double," and when we sold this riverfront property nestled in the mountains of Northwestern Montana, we received double the value of our property in 2007, just as the market was about to crash in 2008. If God did it back then, He can do it again!

I wrote a few stories from this time of our lives: The Sacred Dance of Life, The Horse Gourmet, Mind Over Moose, and more.

This was another home: This is the hot mineral pool I bathed in every day, while living alongside the Big Horn River. The property was owned by an elderly woman who took me in, in exchange for doing chores on her large property. I bought a camper for $800, worked at a local hotel, used an outdoor latrine, and washed my dishes on an outdoor camp table using the hot mineral water from this pool. I know what it's like to be content having a lot, and also a little.

I wrote a few stories during this time: "Voice of the Moonflower," "Lakota Rescue," "Secret Heroes," "The Art of Goofy-Stupid" and more.

This was the view from my camper, alongside the Big Horn River – a place of beauty, truth, rest, and promise…. but still in the danger zone… because the adventure was still unfolding!

Note from the future, as I speak to the woman who lived here 4 years ago: Don't ever give up, even when it feels even God has abandoned you! Never give up, because today you have the opportunity to have your own home while writing, healing, and returning to business. You're going to buy a ranch and build cabins and yurts to house the widows and orphans of sociopathic abuse!

Dare to believe God for the big dreams! His reputation is on the line, not yours! Your job is simply to believe and then to do the work, to take the actions that will move you closer to the dream! 

All things are possible with God. This is simply another "Mission Impossible" and it's all for GOD'S GLORY to be manifested in your life!

My Full Story     What I Believe    Contact Me

With all my love,


Susan Schiller knows how it feels to lose everything: marriage and family, church and reputation, finances and businesses, and more. Susan's upcoming, interactive memoir, "On the Way Home," tells the story of how she came to be known as "the most abused woman" her counselors had yet met and how she learned to navigate to freedom and fullness.  
Today Susan helps people write their life stories, unearthing the treasures of their past and sowing them into their future, creating new family legacies.

Copyright © 2010 to 2015 Team Family Online, All rights reserved.   For reprint permission or for any private or commercial use, in any form of media, please contact Susan Schiller

Previous post:

Next post:

2010-2018 All Rights Reserved. No information on this website has been evaluated by the FDA. The information presented is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. Consult your physician before undertaking the suggestions on this site. Actual results will vary depending upon the individual and their commitment to the steps set out here. Testimonials are from real persons who are readers of this blog. Before using this site, please read our Website Agreement, which contains terms and conditions, plus our privacy notice. Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links on this site are “affiliate links." This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.” Facebook Disclaimer: